i hope i die playing chicken. i hope its the middle of the night, friends laughing and cursing, im sitting in the middle of the road and the person swerves into the road and theyre desperately trying somewhere that you dont need to be in the middle of the night. They don’t see me, ill throw a last laugh to my friends and turn to see headlights, theyll yell, the person in the car will notice too late, it will hurt a lot. They have to scrape my body off the pavement, my friends are traumatized, crying on each other and police officers that they yelled, theyre just stupid. they’ll share a bond, remember that time our friend got hit by a car, when we were there, when we watched and saw the bones break and the blood ooze out.

i want to traumatize you, like you and all the other people have traumatized me, i want you to know what getting laughed at for being too scared to get out of bed feels like, i want your friends to give you glass eyes when you tell them what youve done. i want you to hurt and wonder if this hole in your chest will ever fill up and find out eventually it never will.

ive found some very beautiful short stories, i dont want to do my homework, i dont want to wake up tomorrow

#tw #clare #suicide talk
2 years ago - 3 notes
  1. rosesmomhasgotitgoingon said: i hope you wake up tomorrow and find a reason to wake up the next day and every day you possibly can after that
  2. weredude posted this